His promise.

"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." John 16:33

A very dear friend sent me this article (http://renuemag.com/2014/03/25/2-remember-tough-time/) at a really great time. Today has been a rather large struggle. Stress is high, emotions are wild, and life is crazy; but, this really reminded me to stop and focus on Who has come before me to make my life possible. 

God didn't promise life would be easy. In fact, He assured us that we would face trials and tribulations, challenges and obstacles. But, He didn't stop there -- He also promised that we would have moments of joy and happiness, praise and thanksgiving. All these circumstances are temporary and last only a short while and honestly, I'm thankful for all of these times because it turns me to different areas of Scripture. I'm not going to lie; today I'm in a weird spot. I'm facing a little of each of those emotions (which, as I'm sure you can imagine is creating quite the emotional roller coaster...) 

Since Scott and I got engaged, the devil has made it his mission to break the bond Scott and I share. Now, I don't claim us to be the "perfect" couple, but we're perfect to me and God has knit us to be exactly who we are.  But this excerpt explained my feelings so perfectly:

"...We’ll likely be attacked because the Devil wants to steal our joy, kill our ambition for spreading God’s Word, and destroy our opportunity at a life full of peace. But, with God, we’re more than conquerors. He gives us the tools we need–His Spirit, His Word, and the local church–a community of believers who encourage each other to be overcomers. We have the choice to put ourselves in better situations, even if it takes us out of our comfort zones."

1- He gives us the tools we need

2- It's our choice to put ourselves in better situations

He's already won the battle for us! He made us conquerors, not because of who we are, but because of who He is IN us. The devil certainly knows how passionate Scott and I are about Christ.  He's not oblivious to the fact that we strive to live for God in everything we do. Because he's no fool it's no surprise that he is trying to steer us apart when we haven't even become one, yet!  The devil won't win if we remain grounded in Christ. 

On the other side of the spectrum, my dad finished his last round of treatment today! It's been a long journey but I'm so excited he is done and thankful for friendships that joined us in this celebration. We won't know if the cancer is gone for a few more weeks, but this is a step closer to the end of this chapter. I'm so proud of my dad. It hasn't been easy for any of us but he has tried so hard to maintain a positive outlook despite the depression the treatments put him in. 

"Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!" Philippians 4:4

What does all this mean?  We must stay focused on who Christ is. We have to dwell in His perfection and cling close to those people He's placed in our lives. We can't run; we can't hide; we need to marinate in His love and rejoice in Him regardless of our current situation. 

Oceans

Encouragement for this week. A reminder to redirect my focus.  No circumstance is out of His grasp. 

http://youtu.be/DGRz2BJQRXU

You call me out upon the waters

The great unknown where feet may fail

And there I find You in the mystery

In oceans deep

My faith will stand

And I will call upon Your name

And keep my eyes above the waves

When oceans rise

My soul will rest in Your embrace

For I am Yours and You are mine

Your grace abounds in deepest waters

Your sovereign hand

Will be my guide

Where feet may fail and fear surrounds me

You've never failed and You won't start now

So I will call upon Your name

And keep my eyes above the waves

When oceans rise

My soul will rest in Your embrace

For I am Yours and You are mine

Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders

Let me walk upon the waters

Wherever You would call me

Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander

And my faith will be made stronger

In the presence of my Savior

I will call upon Your Name

Keep my eyes above the waves

My soul will rest in Your embrace

I am Yours and You are mine

No matter how far I feel from my Creator, He finds ways to remind me He's there and never left my side. So appreciative for the hope and joy found in and through Him. 

I'm engaged!

“This is the first day of my life
I swear I was born right in the doorway
I went out in the rain suddenly everything changed
They're spreading blankets on [concrete]

Yours is the first face that I saw
I think I was blind before I met you
Now I don't know where I am
I don't know where I've been
But I know where I want to go

And so I thought I'd let you know
That these things take forever
I especially am slow
But I realize that I need you
And I wondered if I could come home

Remember the time you drove all night
Just to meet me in the morning
And I thought it was strange you said everything changed
You felt as if you'd just woke up
And you said "this is the first day of my life
I'm glad I didn't die before I met you
But now I don't care I could go anywhere with you
And I'd probably be happy"

So if you want to be with me
With these things there's no telling
We just have to wait and see
But I'd rather be working for a paycheck
Than waiting to win the lottery
Besides maybe this time is different”

This song will forever hold a special place in my heart.  A week ago today Scott asked me the most important question that made me feel like the most special girl in the world.  And, I said yes… of course.

So, here’s how it happened. 

Preface::  Last Thursday Scott got a group of my friends to take me to get my nails done.  This isn’t something we typically do but I was so excited about it I didn’t think twice about the potential of what it could have been for… Mind you, I have always asked that Scott make sure my nails are pretty when he proposed and have always assured him this is how I would find out that he was about to propose… (No one ever surprises me).  It’s the most attention my hands will ever receive – at least they should be pretty!

Proposal::  On Friday, March 7^th, Scott and I were planning to head to Orlando so we could go to Disney the following morning.  Knowing I hadn’t packed and had a ton to do before leaving town, I left work a few minutes early.  Like I always do, I called Scott as I left the office to find out how late he’d be at work (he “thought” he’d have a late day and not be home until 6 or later.)  This wasn’t the case and he reassured me he’d be to my house by 5:30 so we could hit the road.  Well, our conversation ended, as Scott is not much of a talker, and I proceeded to drive home.  When I pulled into the driveway I noticed a note on my door with a string attached (what looked like a key in my front lock) so I started to get slightly concerned.  I slowly approached the door to find a hand written note beginning with the phrase, “Let’s play a game!”  As I opened the door I was overwhelmed at the site of rose pedals and candles that filled the room.  There were six notes scattered throughout the house, each with a reminder of something that happened in that location… such as our first kiss in the entryway. In order to know which note to read, there was twine hung that pointed me in the right direction.  The last note was in the kitchen with a memory of the first time Scott noticed me (doing dishes at our city group). 

That was the final note that led me to the back patio.  When I opened the curtains my heart (and jaw) dropped.  I couldn’t believe what I saw.  The love of my life was sitting in a chair with his guitar in hand on a blanket with rose pedals scattered ever so gently.  Scott started singing “First Day of My Life” by Bright Eyes which about brought me to tears.  If I wasn’t overcome with shock, I would have been balling (thankful for the shock crushing that emotion).  It was the most romantic proposal and I could not have dreamt of anything better, not to mention my ring is absolutely gorgeous.  Let’s just say, God knows what He’s doing and His plans are so much bigger than I can begin to fathom.  I am so thankful for the opportunity to marry my best friend. 

  

  

This sums everything up, perfectly.

Verse

I am but a child in the hands of my Lord

He carries me through rushing rivers, takes me home

When I cannot see, will my faith sustain?

I find my strength in your love, oh in your love

 

Chorus

It is well with my soul.

 

Verse

You are my God who gives breath to my lungs

Maker of all, to You I belong

I hold the hand of my father up above

I have no fear, carried now by perfect love

Thankful.

So, I claim defeat.  It's only February and I missed posting last week.  I'm temporarily disappointed but am able to justify it based on my current level of stress.  Which, is why I'm so thankful.

I'm thankful for my job.  This is the one that I've had a really hard time admitting to be thankful for these days.  Management has changed and my job has basically tripled in requirements which makes me leave most nights feeling completely unaccomplished and unsuccessful.  But, I have a job; it pays my bills; I'm thankful.

I'm thankful for friends who are not conditioned by the number of miles that separate us.  Said friends know the perfect time to send texts, articles, movies, quotes (like the one to the right), and encouragement.  We may not talk every day but each time we do, we pick right up where we left off.  I'm so thankful for phones, and webcams (if that's even a thing anymore) so I can see some of my most treasured friends when it's just not realistic to travel hundreds of miles (if I ever win the lottery, this will become a non-issue!)

I'm thankful for my boyfriend - he puts up with me, enough said.  No, but really.  I'm so thankful for the circumstances that have occurred in each of our lives to bring us to where we are now.  I'm not sure what the future holds, but I'm super excited for it.

I'm thankful for Jesus.  I'm thankful for His unending and unwavering love, even when I don't deserve it.  He continually blesses me, guides me, strengthens me and challenges me.  I know He has put me where I am in life for a reason; it's my duty to embrace it.  

I'm thankful for The Anchor Church which blesses me weekly with encouragement and accountability.  The friendships that have formed because of this church have been incredibly overwhelming.  I don't know where I would be if Anchor didn't welcome me with open arms.

So, while life my be absolute chaos, I'm beginning to accept it.  I'm trying to embrace the busy and remain optimistic.  Seems like it's a constant battle but I'm so thankful for this life.

Renewal

Being a follower of Jesus is a real game changer.  It doesn’t just mean to proclaim you believe in Christ, it requires you to prove it.  “…imitate Him, carry on His ministry, and become like Him in the process.”  It's not like this isn't something I haven't known, but it really hit me like a ton if bricks. It's too easy to get caught up in the ways of the world and become "normal". So, I've been making a conscious effort to change that for myself. My goal is to be less concerned with me and how well my day is or isn't going and focus on the things that matter. It may seem silly but every morning I have been trying to remember to prep myself to have a good day. I remind myself (through telling my boyfriend) that today is going to be a good day because I'm going to make it that way; no matter what satan tries to throw at me I will not let it affect the joy that I feel in my heart; the stress of the day cannot consume me. Honestly, this past week I have been absolutely amazed at how different I feel. Re-routing complaints into praises is something so simple yet so powerful. 

1 Peter 1:8 “Though you have not seen him, you love him.  Though you do not now see him, you believe in him and rejoice with joy that is inexpressible and filled with glory.”

I'm so thankful for this renewed outlook. Needless to say, I really enjoy reading this book, Multiply, with The Anchor and can't wait to see God continue to reveal Himself through this series. 

Encouraged

Every January my company goes through a year-end review with every employee.  Seems logical considering in a company of more than 10,000 employees it's impossible to keep track of the accomplishments people achieve and struggles they face.  However, I'm not a huge fan of this process for several reasons:

1)  It's very time consuming updating a very unfriendly form with repetitious information

2)  Everyone is compared on a bell curve against everyone else regardless of job position/description

3)  If you haven't been with the company for more than 2-3 years, it's impossible to get a good rating

4)  Unless a project is your idea, you will never get credit for it.  Even if you're the one that implements the process changes and does all of the leg work.

Needless to say, this left me slightly bitter and very discouraged yesterday after meeting with my boss (who, by the way, is no longer my manager).  I felt like all my accomplishments in 2013 were completely overshadowed by comments such as, "She's still a new employee", "That idea wasn't necessarily her idea"...  Hearing these things really de-motivated me. 

After venting to my dad about everything that went wrong he simply reminded me of everything I have going right for me.  (One thing I absolutely love about my dad is his encouragement and constant optimism... something I really need to work on)  First, he assured me I was being way too hard on myself (a comment like this coming from the guy where a 98 on an exam was never quite good enough meant a lot).  He followed up with:

In the moment, sure, I was disappointed.  Heck, I guess I still am.  But, one thing my dad helped me to remember is I have a relationship with the Creator of the universe and He doesn't want me to compare myself to other people. 

"Do not conform to the pattern of this world..." Romans 12:2

"For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God?  Or am I trying to please man?  If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ."  Galatians 1:10

So, that’s my challenge to you and my challenge to me.  Don’t allow the world to define who you are.  Don’t allow their ratings discourage you.  Seek the approval of God first and allow that to be the only rating that defines you.

Always...

Oh my God
He will not delay
My refuge and strength, always...

It thrills me to see God moving in my life and in my relationships.  I'm so humbled by the people who have been delicately placed into my life-story.  Tonight I had the opportunity to spend time with a good friend and just talk.  We vented, we laughed, we caught up; it was wonderful.  Then this song came to my head. 

Troubles surround me, chaos abounding
My soul will rest in You...

No matter how chaotic life gets; no matter how overwhelming days are; no matter how stressful work is; no matter what, God shows up and proves Himself to be greater than any circumstance the world throws at me by blessing me with incredible people to do life with. 

I will not fear the war,
I will not fear the storm
My help is on the way, my help is on the way... 

Christ is closer than I make Him to be.  He cares deeper than any earthly relationship will offer.  That's pretty unfathomable to me, especially after nights like these when I'm so refreshed and in awe of the earthly relationships in my life.  Then I'm reminded - these relationships are rooted in Christ which dramatically changes the playing field.  Needless to say, God is so gracious.  I am so blessed.

I will not fear
His promise is true
My God will come through, always...

Anchorversary

I feel so blessed and thankful to open my home for The Anchor's Collective practice.  Tonight, they did this song that sent chills up my spine.  I had to go into the living room to hear more clearly and find out what song it was!  To my surprise, it is an original that is incredibly moving.

Truly, truly
You're making all things new

Surely, Surely
You've paved the way to You

The cross has pardoned every grievance

What sin had severed
Grace has mended

The death that shatters
The Son has ended

He gives me rest when these bones are weary

Emmanuel, God with us
Emmanuel, brushes off the dust

Lovely, lovely
The way You've called me Yours

Mercy, Mercy
My soul is made secure

I'm kneeling sinner, You stand me blameless

Like nothing, nothing
These waves You walk upon

Jesus, Jesus
How can my shame be gone

You must be Savior, this must be gospel

I will call upon the Son
And He will chase away the wolves

It is so easy to take for granted everything God blesses us with.  Jesus calls me His. 

I belong to the Creator of the universe... 
...the only one that can cleanse me of all my junk... 
....the provider of the impossible... 
.....the redeemer of the undeserving... 
......the answer for the confused... 
.......the rest for the weary and heavy laden
Whatever it may be, God supplies.  All we have to do is simply ask.  I'm in awe of His majesty. 

I am so thankful to be involved in such an incredible church that overpours with talent.  Thanks, guys, for this reminder tonight...

Reminiscent

This was a weekend to remember. It was quiet; it was calm; it was needed. After a long and rough week at work, I needed a 'lax weekend to just recharge.

Friday...
A night that started by sharing dinner with my boyfriend and then later enjoying the company of my sister and her friend while playing games and laughing. This past week my sister has been slightly out of commission because she was bit by a cat and had surgery on her finger. So, while it seems insignificant, surgery on a finger can really put a damper on everyday routines (1 Corinthians 12:12-26). As terrible as it may sound, this incident has been a really great thing for my family. It allowed us to bond at the hospital and continues to grow the relationship between Tracy and I as she needs to rely a lot more on people for things. (Hey, I'm not complaining! I'll do almost anything to spend time with my sister!) Anyway... back to my weekend.

Saturday...
I was very content with staying in my PJ's all day and doing little to nothing. So, Scott joined me and we watched a movie and lounged until I decided to do laundry and saw my mess of a garage. It was then that I decided it would be a good idea to rearrange the mess. Well, as opposed to this idea as Scott was, he couldn't just watch; so, he came to help. What I saw as a small task turned into a huge project; but, the outcome was very rewarding -- I can actually see the floor! We ended the day by going to my parents house to share dinner and play cards - always a fun time to be had by all! Saturday night, Tracy came back to my place to spend the night (really, she just wanted to use my Internet, but like I said, I'll take what I can get!)...

Sunday...
To my surprise, Tracy accompanied me to church and after we spent the afternoon with some friends while enjoying tacos and laughs! I concluded the weekend laying by the pool and spending more time with Tracy.  We played Dominoes and then I washed her hair, remember, she's gimp! But it was absolutely hysterical.

Just some moments I don't want to forget with family and friends I couldn't be more thankful for.

Four

Today marks four months from when Scott asked me to be his girlfriend, ever so sweetly. It's almost hard to believe it's been four months but, he continues to spoil me and makes me feel like the luckiest girl around. Last night was no different. I have had a pretty rough week at work and I was feeling pretty defeated. So, after work I went to the Links to spend some time with Steph and Noah while Scott went to class. When I got home, I began heating some dinner and studying. It wasn't long before my pups started going nuts and there was a knock on my door. If you know me at all, you know this startled me and altogether freaked me out. Hesitantly, I got up to look through my newly installed peephole... SCOTT! He never knocks, ever! Without skipping a beat, I quickly unlocked the door to let him in. As if that wasn't surprise enough... Four roses, Dunkin dark roast, cinnamon rolls, and hot chocolate filled his hands. Yeah, maybe he was a day early, but it is just what I needed - his surprise visit was more than welcomed to pull me away from studying.

Time may be flying by; but, I feel so blessed to be sharing my life with such a sweet guy!

2014: A New Year

As 2014 begins, I can't help but be overwhelmed with excitement for all the goodness that is to come.  I rang in the new year with some of the greatest friends: people that graciously opened their hearts to me only about four months ago.  They accepted me as I am and didn't skip a beat with allowing friendships to be formed.  I shared a kiss with my best friend and then proceeded to dance the night away.  I'm blessed to be loved and accepted by such wonderful people.

Left to right: Adrian, Alyssa, Bobby,
Adri, me, Scott, John, Shara)

Scott and me <3

So, while everyone is busy making New Year's resolutions, I'm going to do mine a little differently.  This year, I am going to try to blog weekly.  I really enjoy writing thoughts regardless if anyone stumbles upon and reads them.  This is going to be challenging as I don't always know what to write about; but I'm excited for the challenge! 

Here's to 2014 A new year with great things in store!  Cheers!

2013 in recap

So, I meant to post this on Tuesday, the 31st, but time slipped away and I forgot... So, here goes it...

This has been one of the best years of my life. It started off rough with so many questions, lots of confusion, and resulted in me making one of the biggest/hardest decisions I've ever encountered. I've learned how to trust; I've learned how to let go; I've learned how to forgive. But following the heartache, following the pain, I came out on top and couldn't be happier than I am today.  So, I'd be remiss if I didn't embrace both the bad and the good from this year. It's all shaped me to be the woman I am today.

"Pain lasts only a night - joy comes in the morning" 

Christ proved this verse in more ways than I could fathom this year.  He showed me His love and mercy time after time and provided me Hope.

January - March:  Breakup and heartache

April:  Keys with the greatest family; bridal shower for my best friend

May:  Jacksonville with two of my greatest friends

June:  Patmos Awakening - a challenging, much-needed wake up call.

July:  Surprise birthday party; passed my first section of the CPA

August:  North Carolina/Tennessee; met the love of my life

September:  The adventure with Scott began

November:  Disney with Scott

December:  Christmas combined with Scott's family and my family; birth of NOAH COLOMA LINK!

Needless to say, I have been blessed beyond measure.  2013 was a great year filled with travel, new friendships, and love; but, I know 2014 is going to be incredible!  I can't wait to see it unfold!